*Warning this is a book, or possibly a chapter of one in the making. (In other words it's really long, but well worth the read!) Reading the following could result in awakened truths, new-found strength and potential, and greater resolve to dig into the trenches and restore your faith in coming to peace with the deep.
The energy forecast for today is…
go toward that which you flee. In other words, to the best of your ability ( and we’ll get into that further here), run, head on in the direction of that beast that you are terrified to face that is making a guest appearance and is really wanting to be revealed.
The vision I’m getting is a scene from an old Godzilla movie, where they’re zoomed in on the eye of the beast. It’s that eye that is central here, for you today. There were little armies of guys who were being lured in to tie up this ginormous beast, and next to the eye of it, they are microscopic (and that’s only the eye, not the entire thing!) Yet these little army men were brave and took to the task of saving the day so that to their people some peace they could bring.
That’s what we’re talking about here. As long as you’re running and screaming in the streets (another great vintage visual from the Godzilla flick), there is absolutely no peace. The funny thing about running from the things we fear in life is that we fool ourselves into believing that by not facing this thing that we flee we will maintain some measure of ease. And I suppose that’s true to some degree. We avert the anxiety of stepping into unchartered territories and using our voice, becoming a hero, reclaiming our lives, standing up for what we believe, and seeing the unseen. But we also abandon, in those moments of flee, the truer message underneath. We leave that soldier stranded, the one who wants to go in and save the day. We leave a piece of ourselves behind by turning away from the key. For, in each of these ‘teachable’ moments, where we can learn to be more, to be brave, to follow our hearts and see how that feels, we get our feet wet, we get a little more comfortable with wearing those shoes (or army boots), we open up to more of a chance of repeat.
We run from that which we resist because we’re afraid of what we might see. We don’t really want to look into the eye of the beast, because it is there, in the soul of ‘the monster’ that we will see the truth. From the truth we want to hide, because too often, truth reckons accountability. If we know that we are betraying ourselves, that we are settling for less, that we are our own reason for running scared and empty-handedly avoiding our dreams in the streets- then we have to (on some level) come to terms with that. We have to then See (become conscious) of why we’re doing it and, therefore, what we believe. And that’s all some heavy stuff to contend with. It’s much easier to run away and scream.
And that’s just what you may be doing right now anyhow. The other part of the vision appears to be the Galactic Center, and still resembles very much the Godzilla eye, both representing facing an overwhelm or a disbelief, and an overflow or overabundance of everything (namely what is, will be, has been, and the all and the everything that's been unseen). No wonder peolpe are freaking out!
There may be some truths coming to the surface for you, or coming into better view that can, on some levels, be horrifying (to say the least). When we are faced with our truths, especially the ones we’ve gotten really good at hiding from, they can be very hard to swallow and believe. You may find yourself a little in shock as the truth comes into focus, as the real of reality comes crashing down, or becomes so obvious that you can’t pretend you didn’t see.
It’s ironic that such a big aspect of why we run, why we fear doing that thing that will set us free has to do with judgment. We fear what others might think if we step into the shoes of the one who speaks his truth, of the one who surrenders to their highest calling, of the one who is brave enough to be free enough to Be. Yet this judgment encapsulates us in a prison within ourselves and for too long it’s one where there is no warden in which to appeal. We fear being exposed and revealed to such an extent that we freeze off from ourselves, from our needs, from our deepest longings of being received. We sabotage our best efforts in an attempt to keep it all even keel. Then one day, we realize that we can't live in the bubble of the illusion anymore as our wounds come to the table and as we come to terms with the fact that it's no longer viable to freeze or flee. It all comes crashing down on us as the beast enters the village seemingly out of nowhere and we are left to contend with levels of grief and rage and fear and agony that we aren’t even sure we are capable of surviving if we commit ourselves to holding the space to feel.
( A little more human nature)...The judgment is a double sided sword that is ultimately our own undoing, as we grow steeped in the shame of the image we project onto ourselves and we try desperately to hide what we seek to conceal. Yet we judge as well, our inability to go beyond the barricade of the barriers and our resistance to step out of the wound and heal. We denigrate ourselves for not being able to be more, to be better, to overcome, and to repeal the sentence that we have set for ourselves whence we were tried, convicted and sentenced to the hell of our underworlds where we remain, or where the wounds remain untouched, until someday there is the element of grace that shines down and rescues us from being slaves to the fear that the unleashing of our deepest selves will be the thing that undoes us and shows us through the miracle of love that it is in opening to those places that we are wholeheartedly redeemed.
The beast is being summoned for a very precise and specific reason at this time. For, in the eye of the beast is the piece and the part of you that most needs to be received. You are being called to look into the eye, into the heart and the soul of your deepest self, and hold space for what has been most un-quenched and most unlovable. And in the hour that you can hold the light for this part of your self to heal, and hold the love for the essence of this aspect to be revealed, you will again be reunited with the innocence that has been missed since this piece was concealed.
Forgiveness is called for here. We must forgive ourselves for refusing to love, for refusing to respond to the cries of this soul part, and for refusing to acknowledge, accept, and appeal to the wound that is now revealed. We must let go of resentment towards others and forgive them for the parts we projected onto them as our dramas prevailed. We, in an effort to keep the demons intact and locked away, have taken to the task of town cryer for the wrongs that have been done upon us rather than resolve the mirrors they reflect of the wrongs we have done upon ourselves. We must forgive the regrets of all the days and duties gone by, and sit with compassion for the parts of us that just couldn’t be/do,whatever it was we longed for, and didn’t know why. We must sit and hold love for our wounded watering-hole of rejection as we hold the space to see that it was us that needed most to receive us, and that any and all rejection that was ‘perceived’ was only pointing us back to this initial wound and the role of victim and wounded solder that we came to play. We must accept that we have agreed to play this role this time, through certain vows or creeds, but we must also welcome that we can set that down now, forgiving past pains, and be made new in the image that our truest self of selves reveals.
We are the creators of our realities and it’s time to take a more active and productive role with ourselves and our lives. If we want to elude the disasters and the pain of the past then we must face the demons we’ve concealed. You can’t go over or under, you have to go through. You have to get dirty. You have to get your hands, and your hearts, and those places on your cheeks where the tears stream, wet. And in this, you will be realigning with your core. In realigning, it’s like being readjusted, you are setting the bones of who you are strait. The bones in our body will heal over an injury or a wound, but left to themselves and untreated or neglected, they will often regrow or heal over in a way that won’t properly and completely heal. The bones of our souls are the same. We must go in and reset those bones, which can be painful, yes, but proactive and healing in that they are being aligned and corrected so that the flow may be known, so that we can live from a place of life-force over restriction, so that we may heal rather than continue to recycle upon recycle the pain.
So the question remains. How does one look the monster in the eye and survive? You simply decide that you will. You dedicate, first, to opening up to See, clearly and fully, what is staring you in the face and determine not to run away. But rather than getting lost and swallowed completely by the pain, you hold the space for it in compassion and dare yourself to go deeper. You must dive in order to get to the heart of what has kept the demon and trickling down demonic behaviors of soul-sabotage and self-hatred alive. And in the depths you are sure to find some certain and strong elements of self-loathing, deep-seated beliefs about being unlovable or unworthy (most often one and the same), and…sadly a need to seek justice through the ‘self-corrective’ behaviors of punishing the one who feels the shame.
But what makes you bigger, and big enough to face the monster (a.k.a. the pain) is that you decide and summon the strength to not become frozen by this profound, overwhelming, and quite possibly horrifying terrain. Here is where the greatest courage lies, and it’s a little known secret (so if you’ve made it this far in this extra long post, you’ve rewarded yourself with the key!). Many before you have gone up against the godzillas within, some do it in one fashion or another every day, as those parts of them that are ready to be revealed and reckoned with refuse to lay dormant and the way that they’ve done it thus far becomes obsolete so they’re no longer able to ‘sustain’ the survival mechanism that have been in place. But how many are able to look at ‘the beast’ and go on with their day? I’m not talking about denial, or running away. I’m talking about facing these fears and this pain, and accepting that it’s there, but not letting it get in the way.
There is this energy now unfolding where all of our deep, dark secrets are coming to the surface to be seen. It’s time to come clean. And the Universe is taking no measure to pull back on pulling all of the stops until we move forward in wholeness and in peace. But to do that we have to move rather than get frozen in the reflection of our pain. We can’t let it wash us away. We get stuck, too often, in shock, in terror, in overwhelm, in the thick of the pain. That’s why nobody wants to go there. They fear that if they do, if they let out the stopper, if they go to the deep, then they surely will never escape. But we have to believe that we’re stronger than that, and the way forward is to exact and extract the pain, not get swallowed by it or altogether avoid the deep.
Up and out and forward. Let it come, let it go, and then continue to move through your day. And not everything will always get solved in one sitting. So, here’s a thought, why not put a marker there, in that spot where the pain has bubbled up and oozed over, acknowledging that it’s a real thing, but taking the liberty to say that it’s something that doesn’t have to get ya, and that getting paralyzed by it isn’t the way to save the day.
We think that if we get caught up in the details and swim in the sea of this thing that’s screaming for redemption, then we are doing our part, but really, we are doing ourselves a disservice when we stop cold in our tracks and grow numb from lack of movement while life keeps on living and we let all of those moments that are happening (with or without us) get away.
So here are your marching orders. You must go in and assess the ‘danger’. Get in close enough to really See what you’re up against, to know the root of your pain. Then determine that you are enough, (strong enough, brave enough, solid enough, powerful enough, worthy) to not get eaten alive by the dragon that must be slain (or tamed). This is the bottleneck where we get swallowed whole too often, where we get stuck, where we get lost, where we become the excuse to not move forward and go into lock-down of become chaser and chased of the pain. We want to chase the dreams. Chase the dreams! (repeat that). Anything that gets in the way of that must not break you down to the point that you stop moving, that you fall into paralysis, that you discontinue to breathe. And that shallow-breathed place that we’ve all gone to when we succumb to the anxiety and the unraveling fear of being in the same room with our demons is the place I’m talking about going beyond. It's the place that we fear most, but done right, it's the place that invariably holds to key to free. So, whatever you do, don't let yourself get stuck here.
We’ve done that already. Time and time again. Let’s try it a new way now. By becoming the platoon sergeant in this army defending the threat on your homeland security, going into combat with this titanic and overgrown beast, you must have a mission statement and a strategy. You must be fearless. You must decide that, no matter what, you will come out alive. And you must be determined and steadfast in your role as the one who's at the helm and in the lead. You are in charge here. Find your inner authority (not the Natzi or the judge or the one who has a death-grip on the wheel of life, but the one who will lead you into victory and off the battlefield in one piece). By acknowledging this piece of you (and albeit it Is a piece! It may seem larger than life and it has no doubt trickled in and out and through your life in many, many ways, but it is only a piece wanting to find the whole), by acknowledgin it, by facing it and looking into the eye of the beast, you command your post by getting front and center in your life, by coming into consciousness, and by preparing yourself to receive the information that has remained unknown and forever (until now) locked in the deep. And your only job right now is to look at it and say ‘I see ya” and then get back in the game. That's enough. That's doable. Don't get lost in trying to analyze or resolve or figure it all out. Don't go into the Mesiah mode of cleansing yourself from all of your sins, just hold the space, take a look, and for the first time, and for now, really determine to open yourself to stop running away from the myth of what is and SEE. That's actually movement. And in and of itself, it's healing. And if a part of you doubts what I'm saying, just dare yourself to take a chance and beleive.
No more game-stoppers. No more getting stuck. No more forfeiting to the fight and loosing your way through the night of your demons while exiling your dreams. You have dreams to live, and breath to breathe, and even though the ‘posing threat’ of invasion may loom ahead or in the ever present as all of the everything from all of our depths and dimensions is brought to the surface, the point of it all is for it to be seen.
See it, check. Moving on with said plan and momentum, check. Getting lost or barraged or bombarded by the pain, no longer the game. Evoke your lieutenant or your captain. Be resolute in your mission to salve and balm your many unsought and rediscovered selves with compassion and then get on with your day. In one day’s time, in one moment’s is the continual flow of potential, and possibility, and momentum that is flow. And you serve no one, most especially yourself, by checking out of that reality and into the wreckage without the intention to survey the damage, hold the light for healing, and proceed.
Do it new. You owe it to you. Time for action. Time for precision. Time to set yourself free. Got the key? Then carry on, soldier. Go get your enemy, love it a little bit (or a whole lot) and be resolute to keep on keepin' on when it comes to living your dreams.
Best of luck and wishes to you and you survey and surmount the deep!
You'll see it all different tomorrow, and will live to tell the tale of your parts and pieces that you can gather to your heart and add to your list of credentials for dream weaving as an every-flourishing and spectacular human being. And these are the pieces that in gazing upon and no longer abandoning, you have set free.
Blessings and light, dear ones, blessings and light and new found capability.
~Rhonda
Hand holding in excavating of soul parts and pieces, and empowerment coaching for all of you deep-sea divers found here
Get ready for an action packed forecast for tomorrow, as I join you again for my birthday!
Copyright © 2010 Rhonda Simpson~Conscious Co-Creating. Permission is granted to copy and redistribute this transmission on the condition that the content remains complete and in tact, full credit is given to the author, and that it is distributed freely.
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