Taking Inventory

When we are called to make choices, it is helpful to take a good look at every thing that could and needs to be factored in. When we are looking to our life and wanting to make sense of it, to create order. When we know that some things must go, but we are having a hard time coming to that place of closure with it, we must take inventory.  Taking inventory, at a deep as well as surface level, will help us to find our way with it, will bring us a sense of peace.

It is important to ask yourself, in making choices about keeping or giving away, about maintaining the status quo or ending, about moving forward rather than holding back- what lies behind these choices we are at the crossroads with, and what keeps us from knowing what the best possible choice should be.

When we begin to take inventory, we are embarking on a therapeutic maze of our insides out.  We are addressing the questions that we don't want to answer, or have been avoiding, and possibly the ones that we hadn't even seen.   Looking deeper at the root and the salvation of a choice will help us to move more freely in defining our lives in a way that will better depict our truest spirit and support our greatest life, as well as our greatest adventures in the days ahead.

The best question to begin with when 'fencing' with a choice is ultimately “Am I making this choice out of love or fear?” When you ask of this, you will find that there is much more richness that needs to be explored and even elevated to the point that it plays a greater role in your consciousness.  It is well said that to make a choice in anger is always a mistake.   It could be said, as well, that to make a choice out of pure unconsciousness may not play out to your advantage either.

So ask, when you look at the thing before you, that choice that you are struggling with, the one that you know you really ought to make.   If I feel so strongly about making a decision here, if I know one is called for, what is in the way of me making it?  What is in the way of me being clear?  When our choice-making is mottled, generally it speaks to one thing: We are grappling with conflicting feelings, desires and emotions, and we're not sure which one to let win out, which one to side with, which one to defend.

When you are faced with a choice, and you know it will define your life in a great way (or at least you feel a sense of enormity to it), pull out the aspects of the choice, pull out the worst-case scenarios, think of what prompted you to make the choice to begin with, sit with what brought you here.  A part of you wants you to look at this avenue of your life, to explore it deeper, this thing that must change.  And a part of you, if you are in conflict, is afraid of the perceived or possible consequences of that choice and ramifications of making it.

Take a relationship, for example, that you are thinking about ending.  (Leaving a solid job in pursuit of your passion would be another good case here, because it speaks to the same theme, which is ultimately security, or what is known, what is secure and safe).  If you are knowing on some level that this relationship needs to be over or end, what part of you is asking for that separation and brake? What part of you is unhappy, brought this up to begin with, and is on some level feeling forsaken?  If you have been at this crossroads with this choice within this situation before, or time and time again, why not take this moment to go a little deeper and see what your soul really needs to say.

What are you longing for in your life that this relationship takes away from or depletes?  What influence are you under that keep you hypnotized and oblivious of the fact that you are unhappy and on some level really don't want to stay? What do you fear will happen if you did leave, if you did make the brake, if everything didn't stay this way?   And what are you in search of that is at the heart of this quest, that you truly need more than anything right now, that you are shown in your longings, in your desires, in those moments where you think of what else you could be harvesting if what depletes you wasn't there?

And as you go inward and begin to ask yourself these questions, see which of your answers and which of your motives are based in love, and which are rooted in fear.

Are you afraid that if you end a relationship, you will be alone, will feel abandoned, won't be able to survive without them there? And, to go a bit deeper, is it your fear of losing this person or facing these deeper-rooted emotions instead?  If you are afraid of taking the leap and following your passion and leaving behind a job that's safe, are you not rather running from underlying beliefs that create pain?

It is common to want to run from our shadow, from our deepest pain, from our 'issues' when they are triggered, for fear of, if unleashed, how they will behave.  But are shadows are the places asking for love.  The places needing us, calling out to us to be free.  And whether you choose to let them out to play or to visit with them now will determine how long or how often you will have to revisit the scene.

You don't have to fully submerge yourself, to get lost in it, to become your darkest places in order for them to be seen.  But if you open the crack a bit, and acknowledge them, hold the space for them, extend compassion, it will go along way.

Have faith in you as you travel, as you are faced with choices, as the waters of the deep rise.  Know that you have the wisdom and the strength within you to prevail. And if you decide not to move forward, to stay put and hold on to the safer territory, know that you will have another chance later, and that when you are ready, making a choice will be an easy thing.

Know, though, that making no choice at all only keeps you stagnant, makes you frozen, blocks your energy, and on some level drives you insane. No 'fencing' it or straddling both sides of the fence you're facing. Let the unconsciousness pay it's visit, and decide that in making your decision, you will consciously choose to do the right thing. And remember, whatever the 'right thing' is for you now, could be different later.  So be with where you are now, in your decision process, and honour that if you are not quite ready to take that leap or make the cut, that when you are, you will not feel so much conflict, and you will not feel quite so much pain.


Blessings on your your journey forward.
May you know you more every inch of the way.

~Rhonda
rhonda@awakeningthedivine.net

 Copyright © 2012 Rhonda Simpson~Conscious Co-Creating. Permission is granted to copy and redistribute this transmission on the condition that the content remains complete and in tact, full credit is given to the author, and that it is distributed freely.