Integrating Integrity

To live in integrity means to live our truth, means to live fully in the truth of who we are- to express it- to Be it- to rise to it, and let it be risen.  In the earlier post about the energy this month, I mentioned that this is a time of really wanting to indulge, in a Big way. Perhaps what we are wanting, though this is a time to let life be a thing of decadence, is a fuller sense of the I AM.  Perhaps what we are really longing for and craving, and what is being expressed and sensed within us, is a wanting for more of our Selves to be felt, to be experienced, to be realized.

For so long, we experienced the longing to fill the hole with a drive to pursue something out there, in the world, that could quench us, or suppress us (or that innate longing). And so too, now may be one of those times when we are being exposed for our ‘go-to’s or our bandaid fix for ‘The Quench’ of our souls that sends us searching for wholeness and needs long unmet.

When our needs aren't met by others, we come to believe that needs can't be met by another, so we develop a dependency on things. We really don’t get ‘met’ or satiated for long by things, so we overindulge until we feel numb. And since this pacification worked (sort of) or seemed to anyway, it becomes an addiction. Since those needs or those inner longings aren’t quelled for long, when the cry of inside sounds again, we go to the refrigerator, the liquor store, the mall. We go to the ‘thing’ that we think will make it alright and the thing that will lullaby our longing, at least until next time.

And all of us have some ‘thing’ that we turn to. And that’s alright. There’s no need to be ashamed of who or what we’ve been or what we’ve relied on to survive.  But we’re being provided with an opportunity right now to see how we respond to that inner cry of the wild, the song of the soul, that wants to be set free. And we are being motivated to bring in more of our Selves rather than numb over the hole that’s been perfectly engraved for our Sacred soul’s fit. It is our soul, our Is-ness, our truest selves that can fill that void and quiet the longing (or the loathing for not letting it in). And until we fulll-fill ourselves with what we really desire, those longings will go unmet.

This is a time, no doubt for living large and truly tasting the fruits of the world and really quenching our thirst for life. This is a time to explore and indulge and be extravagant with our pleasures. And this is truly a time to give to ourselves all that we desire and all that brings us joy.  But we are cautioned to be aware that that alone, these seeking of pleasures and gratification of desires, is not all that we are meant to be dipping into as we’re expanding more fully into what it means to be alive.  

You will know when you are running from what you don’t want to feel, from the parts within that you don’t want to meet with loving arms but would rather run from.  You will know by how you feel after you indulge. If you are still ‘hungry’ for something, if you feel sadness, if you feel deeper longing, you are keeping a part of yourself down. Not all of the soul is always rejoicing or is comfortable to be with. There are deep feelings within you that need to be released, need to be felt, need to be held. And as you begin to step out of your comfort zone and let more of your soul in (and out), and as you begin to notice and sit with the times that you don’t, you will begin to experience some not so pleasant, perhaps, things. You will feel the sadness for running away from, abandoning, or withholding self.  You will feel the rage of rejection (you shunning you in the name of someone or something else, or in the name of convention).  You will feel despair as the parts of you that have been held down wonder if they will ever be set free. And it is of utmost importance for you to hold the space for compassion for You as you, and all of your parts, are unveiled.  It is in doing this that you begin to become whole, as you welcome you in, without the stipulation of you needing to be a certain way. Unconditional. That’s what’s called for.Unconditional forgiveness.  Unconditional love.  Unconditional joy. You’ve lived by the ‘condition’ long enough, wouldn’t you agree? Time to open your heart and try it new, try on You.

When we bring in more of our selves, when we let our selves shine through, there is an inner peace and joy that cannot be surpassed by anyone or anything.  It is joy ‘for no reason’. It is unconditional, not based on any outer circumstances. And in this state of inner expansion, there is profound selflove; love like you’ve never quite experienced before, love that doesn’t compare. And this is the very thing we most long for.

For all of those who have tried (as you might) to bring in or command a greater sense of self-love, this is so much easier (and effective). All that’s needed is that you breathe into your higher self, your essence, and let it come in, intend it in, fuller, and you will feel the difference.  You will feel more grounded.  You will feel lighter.  You will feel centered.  And you will feel love. Try it.  Often.  And you will begin to experience the kind of love (and the kind of life) that you are craving.

Living in integrity means listening to and living from your heart. Begin by listening more closely to it’s requests and you will better know your self.  And when you’re not sure what your heart is saying, or how to tell the difference between your heart and the voice of your ego, begin to question until you can better differentiate. Try both options (that of your heart and that not) on for size and Feel what moves you with the rhythm of your soul.  Feeling is key here. After all, it’s the language of the heart. So learn to still your mind enough to feel into how you feel. Pay attention to your inner navigational system.  It won’t steer you wrong. It knows the way. And you will too as you begin to allow yourself to expand in this way.

Here’s a little tip that will help along the way: don’t buy into the ‘rational’ of guilt or shame.  You don’t need this to temper your desires or your dreams. Banish the notion that you are sin. Outcast the belief that it is imperative that your actions are not harmful to others or that if you do for yourself you will be doing against another in turn. Doing for you, following your heart or your inner longings does not make you wrong, bad, or selfish. It makes you stronger and more alive. And in that sense, you can actually do and be more for others.  You have to drink from the fountain of You first though. Take time this month to witness where and when you give yourself away for fear that you will do somebody wrong. In order to override your barriers to You, you must first learn to notice where you hold yourself back and why. If you are compromising you in the name of guilt or obligation, challenge what you’re trying to live up to and whether or not it’s real.  Play around with new ways of thinking, being, doing and see how they Feel to you. You’ll soon realize that choosing You isn’t irresponsible, it’s probably the most responsible thing you’ll ever do.

Part of owning you is trusting you. You have to retrain your thoughts to that they support You and honor your truth. If you are doubting You, how can you feel good about yourself?  Allow for expression without abandon (without regret), and know that you are learning more everyday how to keep life in tune with your truth.

Understand that choosing a new way isn't always comfortable. It takes some adjusting to Be a new way and to listen to your heart instead. As you are opening to a new way, you are walking away from the old. Feelings of sadness, grief, despair, or anger are normal as you are shifting and leaving behind your old identity, what you've adhered to and subscribed to all this time. Expect some confusion and some delay of settling into the new groove as all of you settles into being new, as All of You adjusts to the new surroundings. And be gentle with yourself as you acclimate to change and allow for higher ways to be imposed. Change can be scary and is something all of us avoid, to one degree or another. Be with you and bring in the compassion you would offer a friend during a time of transition so that you can open to grace.

Open up to you and let your heart win. You’ve been waiting for a long, long time for this. The expansion you long for is to fully embody a greater sense of you. Breathe into this expansion and begin to take your cues from You as you let all of the other directives that you’ve been living by fall to the wayside. And by the way, you’re going to expand this month, one way or another, so might as well make it intentional and direct the flow where you want it to go.

Much love to you,

In the name of grace and rejuvination!

All is a blessing. All is a step in the direction of The Way!

Magical moments and a heart filled with peace as it welcomes the You that you long for back home!

~Rhonda

Awakeningthedivine.net

 Copyright © 2012 Rhonda Simpson~Conscious Co-Creating. Permission is granted to copy and redistribute this transmission on the condition that the content remains complete and in tact, full credit is given to the author, and that it is distributed freely.