Self-Sustanance vs Self-Sabotage

When you're running low and wanting more and you're finding yourself at unrest, it's time to reevaluate where you're coming from and become clear about on whose morality you've based your sense of self.  It's time to redefine your spirituality based on the elements of your own truth. It's time to put the martyr mentality down.  It’s not serving anyone.  And really, has it ever?  We’re told that we have to put others before ourselves.  That it’s wrong to put ourselves first.  We fear, based on years of conditioning, that we’ll be viewed as selfish or self-centered if we put our own needs first.  And so at the cost of our souls, we have given our selves over again and again in order to sustain an element of salvation.

It’s projected and expected that we must give, that we can’t say no, that the pain of another supercedes our own.  Here’s where the dichotomy comes in.  We tend to be a very self-serving society, but not in all the ways that it really counts.  There is profound joy and great treasure in being of service, but serving and doing for others doesn’t mean sacrificing ourselves.  There’s nothing holy in bleeding ourselves dry, in being a doormat, in going against our will.  And yet we’re taught that this is par for the course in order to be accepted, in order to receive love, in order to get your ticket to paradise.

How many are steeped in hellish conflict though because they have no sense of self, because they have given away their power, because they find no joy in giving, as they’re trying to scurry away any last remains for their self.

We fill with people and things because we’ve forgotten how to sustain by nurturing our own soul.  We nurture and support our own being when we honor our truth, when we listen to our inner being, when we follow our hearts music and turn away from the rhythm that’s not in tune with our own song.

Sustainability is about strengthening our resolve, our boundaries, our beingness, through understanding our inner callings and discerning what truly matters most.  When we step away from an old way of being, from self-servitude to self-sustainability and preservation, we become more solid in who we are and we begin to discover other branches of our self.

It’s the air-mask-on-the-plane mentality.  You have to put on your own life-saving device prior to rescuing others.  In this time of great shift, as healers abound and service orientation is of great focus, we must take care to become strong in stance before we be that for everyone else.  When we give from an empty well, we are not giving from our highest self.  We are giving out of obligation and too often, breeding resentment and betraying our own deeper needs.

You cannot love another unless you truly love yourself.  You cannot give what you don’t have.  We love and give and wonder why it’s not enough, and it’s because we’ve overlooked the importance and the necessity of self care.  Too many, when asked how they nurture or support themselves, come up empty.  It’s something on the should  or to-do list.  But is that really reasonable, rational, or coming from a conscious place?  We’re used to pushing our self aside and putting our selves last, but that martyr mentality doesn’t serve us, or anyone else for that matter.  It only creates empty space that continually seeks to be filled.

What if self-love where on the good hygiene list, right up there with brushing your teeth, twice a day or after every meal? How would that feel?  We brush our teeth, we maintain oral hygiene, to avoid decay.  Go deep for a bit and see how you’re feeling at a soul level.  Is your soul crying out for some care?  Is it tired of being put last or neglected? Is it long overdue?

Ask what you can do to nurture your soul today.  Don’t put it off till tomorrow.  You have to fill before you can fulfill this destiny of yours that’ s in high order.  As you begin to strengthen yourself and your reserves are restored, the order of your spirit will fortify your dreams.  You will not be resistant to moving forward, to following your resolve, when you are blanketed in the knowledge that you’re not going to neglect your self.  Your own needs need met.  And it’s not wrong to meet them.. You are not risking another by strengthening yourself.  You are completing another level of consciousness when you open to self-love as your reality and forsake the mentality of loving yourself as sin.

The greatest ‘sin’ is in forsaking our selves.  In not honoring and harboring respect for our own inner wisdom that calls for nurturing and retribution, we distill a truth that was meant to set us free.  To be of service is to be of love.  But we must begin within.  Release old modalities and beliefs that tell you otherwise.  Let the ‘new’ consciousness guide you to a priority that supports the whole. You are part of that whole. Factor your self into the equation.  Give up being a martyr and decide to become a master. Your enrichment will enable you to further give, from a place of strength and compassion, and will enter you into a vastness that is far more compatible with your grandest version of you and ever aligned with your truth.  Question your reality, or the one you’ve been living, and go out on a limb to try something new and improved. Even if it’s only based on a hunch, if it’s coming from your own curiosity of what could be, it’s worth trying on for size. And as you expand, what used to fit no longer applies. Expand into you first, and the world will reap the rewards. 

In peace and joy,

~Rhonda

Awakeningthedivine.net 

Copyright © 2010 Rhonda Simpson~Conscious Co-Creating. Permission is granted to copy and redistribute this transmission on the condition that the content remains complete and in tact, full credit is given to the author, and that it is distributed freely.